break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
