Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
