Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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