We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
