So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
stop calling my apartment porn island.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Are we still banned from the library?
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize