Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
it wasn't lemon gatorade
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
