the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Randomize
