Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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