I saw his package. It spoke to me.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
