I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
