i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
