Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
