Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Randomize
