Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Randomize