Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
