your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I said "one day" and that day is not today
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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