in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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