whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Randomize
