I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
