His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
