Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Randomize
