I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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