Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
