She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
My dick has a subreddit
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
