y did u give ur computer a hand job?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I licked your asshole in confidence.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
