Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
