if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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