I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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