Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
