i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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