K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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