He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
