the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
i think i have herpe
just one?
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Randomize
