I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
