It's Friday. Sex?
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
