the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
