I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
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