Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I'm bleeding and have questions
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
