There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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