that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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