you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
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