i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
