nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
