She announced her abortion via fbk
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize