there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
