Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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