WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Randomize
