just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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