Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
