What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Randomize
